1. I believe in the 3 second glance. If you find her attractive, count to three, ready.. one, two, if she doesn't glance back and smile by three then LOOK AWAY, AND DON'T LOOK AGAIN. Staring = creepy, so stop.
If we don't notice you staring, you better believe our friends are noticing you and telling us.
2. Be a "one man wolf pack." The 3:1 ratio only works with women:men, not men:women. Groups of men = creepy, so grab your balls, be a man, and go ALONE to approach her.
3. Keep the conversation brief. We don't need to know your entire life story, every detail of your day, how long you've seen us around or where you've seen us. If we're interested, we'll find some sort of way to come find you and talk to you. Talking entirely too much = creepy.
4. Be interested in something other than our phone number. We have a name, so ask for it.
5. If you haven't talked to us, don't EVER say "I think I know you from somewhere" or "I've seen you around a lot." We will assume you've been stalking us. And stalking = creepy.
6. We don't respond to bird calls, howls, etc. You're a man, not a dog. So quit acting like one.
7. Being persistent is like calling over and over for a job you're never going to get hired for. We read your application, and you aren't qualified. Leave us alone, we aren't interested.
8. If you have a smart phone, an iPhone for example, I believe in the 2:1 ratio. Anything after your two texts to her one text is creepy. We will text you back, and if we don't.. take the hint.
9. We go out to look good. so tell us so. BUT, we don't need to hear it more than once or twice. You're a man, not a puppy, so quit acting like one. Drooling is just disgusting anyway.
10. And lastly, (this comes from personal experience..) If you want to hit on us, how about buying us a drink? We like to see if you can make it rain, we especially like it if if you can make it shower. "They don't take credit card?!" Homeboy, you should have brought CASH.
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